Monday, December 5, 2011

One of my three ear ring holes has sealed itself for good. 

That might sound trivial if not odd, but I chose to install that particular third hole in my ear lobe soon after I made aliyah in 1997.  I did it to conquer a fear left over from childhood, and quite frankly, to freak out my parents just a little bit.  That third ear ring in no way represented my sexual orientation (heterosexual BTW) or some major rebellion on my part, since many women and men in Israel have more than the traditional one-in-each-ear.

Ever since the hormone rush of the pregnancy and Raphaela's birth, I found myself constantly and somewhat painfully reopening that spot for my earring, and I finally gave into the apparent will of my body.

This seemingly small moment in my life started me thinking about other "holes" and unresolved issues that I have ignored or mishandled until now.  Inspired by this train of thought, I wrote an email to a woman who used to be my best friend until we had a major falling out, several years ago;  I had no intention or rekindling the friendship, too much poisoned water under the bridge, but rather wanted to let her know that I did wonder here and then how she was doing, and that I only wished the best for her.

I felt quite relieved after sending the letter, and hope that she took it in the spirit in which it was intended, that of kindness to a fellow human being who was once a very important person to me.

Now there are a few members of my extended family with whom I would like to improve communication as well, as part of my spiritual house-cleaning project.  Every intention is there, though it is difficult to know where to begin to get past the awkwardness.  This, however, is an important lesson for myself and Raphaela, to show my daughter that most of the time, everyone deserves a second chance.

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