Sunday, September 18, 2011

My Rosh Hashanah Wish

Purim, bag stolen.  May, emergency appendectomy.  July, Raphaela's surgery.  August, major trauma from land lord.  September, moved to new apartment.

There is a Chinese curse that goes something like this:  "May you live in interesting times."
All I really wish for right now, today and towards the new Jewish year, are a few moments of quiet, tranquility and ease.  A few moments where I can look forward to a decent night's sleep, without planning for some future shock to the system or some health crisis.

When I collected Raphaela from Gan today, the head nursery teacher rushed over to me, and with a look of deep and almost alarming concern, told me that my daughter lacks stability and confidence when she walks, and that I must get her checked by a pediatric orthopedic surgeon.  Personally, and even given my background as a Chiropractor, I don't know that Raphaela should be running marathons quite yet, as she has only been walking independently for three weeks now.

Furthermore, in principle I have no objection to Raphaela receiving a full workup, and over one month ago applied to the specialized pediatric clinic through my HMO. When I called the HMO today, they informed me that they only received my request three days ago (!), and with the holidays coming, it was unlikely that anything could be done for Raphaela until three months from now.

So now the worry about Raphaela's development and walking gets to invade my brain, because apparently I don't deserve that occasional peace of mind.  I spoke today to a woman whose specialty, through both private sessions and a group 20-class course, teaches parents the skills they need not just to survive, but to flourish within their family unit.  I can see having one or two private sessions with her, but cannot honestly commit to a half year of classes.  I don't know where in my non-stop schedule I will find the time, no matter how important the experience and the information.


Ariela said...

Take the parenting workshop and suddenly you will realize how much time you have. This makes time, not wastes time.

Amy Charles said...

For God's sake, she's two years old and just barely walking after surgery that lets her breathe normally. Relax. If she's still having trouble with locomotion when all the other kids her age are running around trying to kick a ball, take her in. Don't let them push or scare you.

Sarah said...

Well, here are my votes. :-)

1) Set up the appointment that might happen three months from now, and put on your calendar, for the day 2 weeks before the appointment, that you now have permission to worry about Raphaela's gross motor skills. Until then, for all the reasons you and Amy said, let it go, knowing that if you want to stress about it you can stress as much as you want in 2.5 months.

2) A story I have about parenting classes. I have charedi relatives here in Jerusalem. When I first met them, they had 8 kids (now they have 12). I asked her (the mom) when it started getting hard, like, how many children did it take before she started to really feel like it's A LOT. She said "five was the hardest. After five, it got easier." I asked why. She said "because when I had five kids, I took a parenting class, and after that everything went so much smoother."

Doc said...

Today I gave the head nursery teacher a form regarding all aspects of Raphaela's behaviour (physical and emotional) at Gan, when I don't see her. It scares me, because sometimes ignorance is bliss. But without this evaluation, the HMO will not grant us even an initial visit.
And the more I know about Raphaela, the more I can help her.