I was watching an episode of Dr. Phil yesterday, in which he discussed the positive and negative consequences of the Big Brother manifestation and complete lack of privacy in this internet age.
There is also a principle of Pessach cleaning, which states that you make an item usable for this particularly finiky food holiday using the methods it normally requires for the rest of year. Fire with fire etc.
And so I am using this public forum to apologize to the woman who brought me into the world, a person who exemplifies compassion and irreproachable service in her community. I have slandered her good name in this blog, and have shattered my parents' trust, a situation which will never be repaired between us.
Relationships between mothers and daughters are complicated, and in anticipation of the mis-steps that I will make with Raphaela, I also hereby apologize to her, in advance.
7 comments:
Wow, what happened? I'm very impressed that you could do this in such a public way.
I am so tempted to write about mother issues etc... on my blog but am too scared of causing trouble. On the other hand - your blog is your outlet for everything you don't have a husband to dump it on.
I know that most of our mothers love us and trying their best, but being a mother doesn't give you the right to be rude without recourse. This is what I hope I will remember when bringing up DD.
I'm impressed, Doc. I hope your parents recognize what it took to write that, too.
@msm: A blog is a publication. Save that sort of stuff for personal correspondence, your therapist, phone conversations, support groups, a diary.
I hate to say it but many of us who read your blog and write comments (including myself) have said not to talk negatively about your mom on your blog b/c perhaps she will read it. In the future, if you wish to complain about your parents, do it with your friends in person, your therapist or write a letter to yourself that you can delete.
I think people today use the internet to disclose all sorts of personal info w/o any thoughts about the repercussions. There are tons of college students who post photos of themselves drinking w/o thinking that perhaps one day they will get a job at a firm that will frown on that type of behavior. Caitlin Davis, an 18-year-old cheerleader with the New England Patriots, was fired over photos she posted to Facebook. Associated Content describes the snapshots:
The pictures showed Davis and an unidentified friend leaning over a passed-out boy whose entire face and body was covered in distasteful graffiti. "Penis," (accompanied by said phallic symbols) 'I'm a Jew' and a couple swastikas are only some of the things drawn all over the unfortunate unconscious friend. A Georgia high school teacher claims she was forced to resign after her principal "questioned her about about her Facebook page, which included photos of her holding wine and beer and an expletive," CBSAtlanta reports. The National Education Association reveals that in other states, several young teachers and school staffers have put their jobs at risk by revealing personal information that parents and supervisors find inappropriate.
Be careful of what you write about your daughter as well. If she were to google herself when she is older, are there things you have written that might embarass her or make her resent all that you share with the world?
Gosh, KGM, you and my mother must be right, I should just shut down my blog, and my feelings.
Doc - when you are a mother it is not just about you and your feelings. In fact, when you are any person with a relationship with another person (mother, daughter, spouse, sibling, friend etc..) it is not JUST about your feelings. Our words can hurt other people - even if they are honest. Don't shut down your feelings, but perhaps be a bit more sensitive about the feelings of other people.
there is a difference b/w saying I feel hurt b/c my mother ignores me or when I came to visit she spent time taking care of everyone but me and saying things like "my mother decided that she was too old or too tired or in too much pain to perform the job of helping me with Raphaela. She slept in late, watched TV and complained about back pains. She bitched about jet lag."
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