tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5488433810039574602.post7743222108478173218..comments2023-10-28T02:50:16.786-07:00Comments on Jewish Single Mom By Choice: First MeetingDochttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261212450148255826noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5488433810039574602.post-65554481807040902142012-07-03T10:28:16.045-07:002012-07-03T10:28:16.045-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Dochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05261212450148255826noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5488433810039574602.post-86539560101660868382012-07-03T10:27:08.615-07:002012-07-03T10:27:08.615-07:00@Amy, I agree with you, I want Raphaela to know th...@Amy, I agree with you, I want Raphaela to know that the fact that she was conceived in a non-conventional way is part of who she is, and I will give her all the lattitude she needs to ask questions and deal with it. I just don't want her to get stuck in that, "I'm different and thus inferior to the other kids because I don't have a Daddy."<br />And as far as the next meeting, it would be LOVELY to hang out, but I don't have any family or consistent child care, besides me. I found it a bit clueless that the organizer assumed that we all have grandparents eager to watch their grandchildren.Dochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05261212450148255826noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5488433810039574602.post-3463790846704882132012-07-03T08:21:27.275-07:002012-07-03T08:21:27.275-07:00Incidentally, about that next meeting -- I used to...Incidentally, about that next meeting -- I used to run a mothers' group, and it was mothers-only. Crucial: a babysitter (or sitters) in the same building or place. We need time to talk as adults, without worrying about what the children might overhear, and without being distracted every 20 seconds by their needs. But I do think it's less than kind to propose a mommies-only and then not have childcare. You might let them know that you'd love to attend but would need that.Amy Charleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07001791173242631714noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5488433810039574602.post-38607692639120324722012-07-03T08:18:25.001-07:002012-07-03T08:18:25.001-07:00Well, hang on.
This is how you view it. You have ...Well, hang on.<br /><br />This is how you view it. You have no idea how RR will view it, and she's just about old enough to start telling you. You may be surprised by her curiosity about and/or desire to be with other children whose mothers decided to go it alone. <br /><br />In general I don't seek out other single-mom families (except on occasions like Mother's Day, so we can celebrate together), but there are plenty of them around. I know it's been helpful to my daughter to see how life goes in other such families, particularly around issues like dating and remarriage. And she's not dumb, she knows there are advantages and disadvantages to various kinds of family.<br /><br />My guess is that by deliberately staying away from other SMBCs and their kids, the implicit message will be "don't be like them". Which would be kind of a mindfuck. I'd say open it up. You can always tell RR later that you don't think some of this stuff is necessary, but I wouldn't be standoffish.Amy Charleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07001791173242631714noreply@blogger.com